Category: Culture
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Is It Ever Acceptable to Genuinely Dislike an Old Person?
They’re often so frail, so vulnerable, so weary eyed, that they unfairly force you into feeling some sort of empathy towards them. But, they were once younger, and there’s a chance they’re still the same twat they were 20 years ago. Suddenly frail, vulnerable and weary eyed turns to weak, pathetic and deserving. No matter…
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I Lasted Two Days as a Weatherman
I looked fantastic in my suit. It wasn’t to my taste but I looked damn tasty in the thing. So much so, they even entrusted me with a laser pointer without any training or license of any kind. On that note, it’s important to mention that the only training I did receive was to make…
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I Was Tormented by a Child at the Funfair
There I am, taking it all in, looking up at the sunny sky every four to seven minutes and going “Can you feel that?” when a child not of my seed enters my life, and things take a turn for the worse. The first sense he infiltrated was touch. His inflatable football, the beach variety,…
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Funerals – I Really Shouldn’t Enjoy Them
Far too often I am the smiliest person in the room, and quite often the warmest too if I manage to nab a seat at the front for a cremation. Does this make me evil? Am I in the wrong? I wouldn’t exactly say that it is clear cut. Sitting on one side of aisle…
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Nightclubs Have Been Far Too Silly for Far Too Long
The bright lights, the beats, the sheer camaraderie, have all blinded us from what’s right in front of our eyes… No one is telling the nightclubs to be a bit more sensible with their opening and closing times. My theory to solve this isn’t one born out of now being in my thirties, in fact…
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Nothing is More Honest Than a Shop Window
Perhaps you’ve been spending most of your time at home or the gym, with lighting you can somewhat control or mirrors you can half avoid, but your incessant thought remains… what do I actually look like? There is nothing more honest than the shop window. Take ten minutes of your day, once a month, to…
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I’m Tired of Celebrities Making Smoothies
These air breathers are living a life I’m struggling to get on board with, despite their attempts to persuade me that blending a few “foods” together is the simplest way to get ahead of my day and would keep me at optimum energy levels for hours on end. Pea protein, chia seeds, other gruel and…
Henry Mulligan 