The bright lights, the beats, the sheer camaraderie, have all blinded us from what’s right in front of our eyes… No one is telling the nightclubs to be a bit more sensible with their opening and closing times.
My theory to solve this isn’t one born out of now being in my thirties, in fact I’ve held this theory for almost a decade, give or take a few years. It’s one born out of common sense and planning.
Whilst I do not frequent nightclubs anymore, the theory still holds strong in my mind, and may also be applied to those halfway houses that are a bit more than a pub but not quite a club. Some of these may be called bars.
The hardest part of a night out, without question, is the recovery. You’ve put God knows what in your body which isn’t something I have the will to tackle for you, but the fact you’re out so late and your routine is obliterated is where I might be able to help with my theory…
Open the clubs earlier, and shut them earlier.
Why isn’t this a thing? Why can’t everyone just have their nights out earlier? Why don’t people deserve a fighting chance at living the next day?
Shut them at midnight and people will soon start flocking to them at 7 or 8pm rather than 10 or 11pm. For those who have damaged brains and want to stay out even later, the dirt holes that have a special license to be open until 6am, would have a special license to be open until 2.30am, so even the mentalists have a fighting chance too!
I understand people might be a little tighter for time getting ready after work, but so what! You’ll get the time back the next day after a much more reasonable sleep!
The people who want to go absolutely mad will always find a way to go absolutely mad, but the majority of us just want to see friends, pick up the scent of fun, participate in a small portion of dancing and bury the feeling of losing our youth. Let’s build the system around us, the majority.
I’m championing this to help you. I theorise because I care.
Poem | Reasonable Night Out
They said I’d missed last entry,
The security on the door,
I told them they must joking,
It was only half past four.
I sloped off for a kebab,
The big boss greeted me,
He said they’d run out of meat,
At only half past three.
Henry Mulligan 
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